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Sometimes our online editor spends too long reading comments online and then she gets grumpy.
1. Pomegranates
They look like mini jewels, but let’s be honest: Pomegranate arils taste of basically nothing and they stick in your teeth something awful. Plus, they cost a fortune.
2. Artichokes
Cooking and eating artichokes from scratch involves a ridiculous amount of labour. And then dipping the little leaves in butter for a milligram’s worth of flesh? Nee, dankie.
3. Pistachios
Don’t get me wrong: I can destroy a tub of pistachio ice cream. But pistachios in their raw form, when coated in those sharp, absurdly strong shells, confound me. The effort-to-reward ratio is just completely out of whack.
4. Balsamic reduction
If I never receive another salad without balsamic reduction squiggles on the plate, it will be too soon.
5. Curly parsley
Who invented this? What is it even?
6. Dukkah
Is it just me, or does this stuff make you cough, too?
Who says gluten free & dairy free can be boring?! We sure don’t especially with our smashed sweet potato, prosciutto, dukkah & onion #merakisole #ardrossan #yorkepeninsula #glutenfree #dairyfree #proscuitto #delicious #foodoptions #healthy #dukkah #spices #lunch A post shared by Meraki Sole’ (@merakisole) on
7. Caviar
I mean, I like caviar. It’s kind of nice how it pops in your mouth and tastes salty. But I really can’t imagine paying millions for that flavour. I mean, chocolate, sure. Cheese, sure. Even coffee. But salty water?
8. Toffee apples
Okay, so these aren’t exactly trendy now, but they once were and that’s what I can’t understand. What you’ve got is some really sharp shards of caramel on top of a seriously mushy apple (floury from the heat of the caramel, if it wasn’t already). I mean, how is this a food that got accepted into the canon of actual foods?
The best thing about the fair #greedypug #toffeeapple #pug #cute #fair A post shared by Hugo Pug (@hugo_pug) on
9. Bircher muesli
There used to be a woman in our office who microwaved her cornflakes with milk to make them soggy. So it’s possible that some people do enjoy the spongy, mushy, cold, baby-food texture of bircher muesli. But I’m convinced that if it weren’t deemed healthy there would be literally one person who ate it.
10. Red-velvet cake
The nice part about this stuff is the cream-cheese icing. There’s absolutely no need for the cake to be red. Unless it’s got beetroot in it, or something.
11. Coconut water
I don’t know, man. It’s like watery tea. Brew that shit for longer.
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…yeah… I think macarons are overrated. They are pretty, but seriously overpriced and do not taste much different from a merengue
12. Truffle
Caviar? Heathens!!!
Very amusing piece – well written. Don’t agree with all! Love me a good toffee apple!
Food Philistine!! 🙂
I’m with you on the curly parsley and toffee apples.
But all of those other foods make life work living!!
Tsk Tsk…
You had me at pomegrantes and artichokes! #onpoint (although I do love bircher muesli…)
Absolutely spot on, right on the money, just been waiting for someone to say this all my life. On ALL of them, no exceptions! If I hadn’t already met my soulmate and the love of my life, I would say Katherine would have to be them.
I cant figure out why prawns and crayfish didn’t make your list!
They are sooooooo overrated, especially when considering value for money. You can spend half an hour wrestling with these nasty crustaceans, only to yield a coupla mouthfulls! And then you dish out R200! Come on!
You just made my day!! i never got the concept of Red velvet cake
Absolutely loved this rant! Hilarious
Hahaha, I LOVED reading this.
I like a lot of the food on the list, oops… Absolutely enjoyed your rant though! Had a good laugh.